Even when PMDD makes me feel an infinite sadness, I turn to the skills I’ve learned that work for me to survive – and through it all, I have even found a bright side.
Even when PMDD makes me feel an infinite sadness, I turn to the skills I’ve learned that work for me to survive – and through it all, I have even found a bright side.
To me, PMDD is a delicate dance between mental states of an overwhelmed, damaged self to a reflective, conscious self. The most challenging piece to this disorder is reaching a state of awareness while submerged in the storm of the lost, debilitated self…
“No more shame! No more fear! No more self-doubt!” After 10 years of coping with my depression, past trauma and alcohol addiction, it is time to come forward with my story. As a sexual assault survivor and Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) warrior, I am breaking the stigma associated with mental illness in hope that my wisdom will encourage others to confidently reach out for help.
When I realized I was suffering from a cycle of depression caused by my hormones, I could not have felt more broken. I had experienced a spell of depression in my teenage years, so it was easy to recognize the symptoms when they resurfaced. This time, however, my circumstances had changed a bit. This depression was not like the one I had experienced before – it was cyclical. Every week or two before my period I was buckling up for depression once again.
One good thing that PMDD has taught me is mindfulness and self care. I recently had to take some classes on meditation and mindfulness for a requirement. In class, we learned how to be more conscious of our bodies and our surroundings. We often did an exercise called a full body scan: we would lay still and scan our bodies to become aware of the sensations. We would also train ourselves to feel the feelings and pain without letting them consume us.
Since I was in my teens, I noticed that I’d have periods of depression or anxiety. I could never figure out that these feelings peaked a week or two before my period. A year or two ago I wouldn’t have been able to feel this shift. I want to share some things that have been working for me.
PMS and PMDD are quite different. However, they are often described in the books as PMS and then PMDD, a more severe form of PMS. This is partially true, but this analogy can create a lot of confusion and harm to all of us. Here is a little synopsis of what we all know so well:
Learning how to cope. The hardest four letter word you will experience when you’re a PMDD warrior. Everyone finds their own strategies to cope. These tips have helped me on my journey and I hope that they can help you too!
Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) “makes my life an endless dance with depression and anxiety to the beat of my menstrual cycle,” and more.
By Susie White Not to beat a dead horse but I guess I’m finally getting up on that horse. The one that Read More
